Wednesday, 31 December 2014

Good bye to 2014

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:05 0 comments
Well here we all are. We did it. Hell YA!!!

We Survived 2014, we made it through.

Ooh song coming on

Mr Manilow If you will:

So Stick that 2014!!!

You tried hard very hard right at the end to break me again, nobody knows how I have been hurt the last month and no one will. I did not like it and still don't. BUT!! I choose not to take that into 2015. 

So 2014 you can keep that with you.

See you in the New Year Everyone. Hope it is the best one it can possibly be for you all.

Loves you xxxx

Sunday, 28 December 2014

Sunday 28th December 2014

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:49 1 comments
WOW! What happened to December? Where Did it go?? 
It went in a blaze of shopping, rushing, working, knitting, panicking and more.

I hope to get back to regular blogging soon and I may even start podcasting (planning January).
I have watched more podcasts by knitters lately than anything either BBC, ITV or Sky are dishing out. Real people sharing life and hobbies. They can make you laugh and cry at the same time - but be warned they enable you so much. That your project and stash lists grow and grow and grow.
Proper reality tv, not over pretentious people trying to be famous.

So I maybe going yarn sale shopping in the town centre today - saving my gift voucher for the wool pallette for when I want to make something for me.

I also have work later. only 3-6pm but it is a drag as today is supposed to be my day off. I have nearly finished my Christmas Jumper (next years now - tut!) It was a first for me as the back, front and arms are knit so far separately and then you knit them in the round for the yoke, which is all stranded work, which I am new to. I knitted it in inexpensive acrylic, as it was a tester to see if I could do it before moving on to other stranded colour work projects in nicer wools for everyday wear. We shall see how it comes out shortly.

I promised Photos of mum and her hubby gifts I made so here they are.

Philips Cardigan

Mums Cardigan

Mums Shawl

Well I can hear my man moving around, so better get off of here and get my coat on. Speak soon.

I hope you all had a very Happy Christmas and hope you all have a fit, happy and healthy New Year xxxx

Sunday, 30 November 2014

Good morning, good morning. Its Sunday 30th November!!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:40 0 comments
It will soon be my Favourite month of the year. YAY!!!!!

I love Christmas and all things Christmassy.

This week despite still having the vertigo, I have had the most amazing week - well a normal week but finished off with an amazing Saturday.

So most of the week saw me working and knitting. so quick catch up.


Mainly Christmas Gifts,  I spent a few weeks knitting something for Mum which I will show after "THE" day, its finished I love it - but its Mums. LOL!

My brothers Jumper - ARRGHHHH!!! finished knitting it went to sew it up and did one side and sleeve seam and I hate it the way the increases were done on the sleeve does not give you a nice seam, and where the sleeve meets the rib top of the front and back the fabric looks Yuck! I know it is mainly the fact that the yarn is an inexpensive acrylic dk - dk pattern and all but, whilst I was knitting in my head I knew it was knitting a thin ugh fabric,  but ploughed on bullishly, as thought it was my heart sulking as I had just knit with a lovely baby alpaca yarn and it was not be as bad as I feared. Lesson learnt and will not succumb to knitting inexpensive yarn  as christmas panic knitting sets in. False economy as I now have to go and buy him something instead.

Wintersweet MKAL cast on - by Boo Knits a lacey Shawl with over 1000 beads. Watch this space.

Paper craft

Nothing, Nada, zip - it did not do it for me this week.

Ooh before I forget Over at Ravelry - Tilly trout forum has me addicted to podcasts on you tube, Tilly does one and I like The sampler girl too, have to check out more as they are new to me. Tempted to have a go myself.

Life - Is Life.
Diet - What Diet?
Exercise - One successful treadmill run followed by a very bad vertigo attack. So on hold.

So Saturday

Finally managed to catch up with friends Elaine and Nova, Life has just got in the way for all of us at the moment but this saturday I booked a day off work to spend with them and them alone. We went to Exeter Westpoint (an events venue) this weekend they were having there Christmas Fayre.

Lots of local food and wine producers, mixed in with some handicraft sellers, and normal market clothes, bags gifts sellers.

I must admit the gift sellers were not upto normal standard this year - but the food and wine sellers are always my personal favourite. with lots of tasters as you go.

So what did I buy - well some I cannot say as this year I was buying for gifts for mum from her hubby (stocking fillers). But Me Yummy - I got my Chaider which is a non alcholic apple drink with I think its ginger or/and  maybe cinnamon which you warm like mulled wine. It is delish so 2 bottles one for Christmas and eh hem one for NOW!

Now I was have been looking for a red wine I loved for years - Travicello Red wine. I know it was from a wine merchant and not available in shops and I found a Wine merchant (Peiroth wines) purely by accident there this year. So asked about the wine and it was one of theirs - Hurrah. BUT!! It is £14.50 a bottle - I would pay it as a Christmas Treat - BUT!!!! I would have to order a case of 12 bottles. NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! devasted.

but not for long!

I moved on to another stall and ooh Lyme Bay winery - Hello my Mulled wine friend, how are you?

Yep mulled wine purchased, and whilst I was visiting them I tried their Elderberry wine - Travicello who??  A mere snip @ £7.95. 1 bottle purchased and then oooh looksie a Elderberry port - Awarded Gold at the 'Taste of the West Awards' 2012.. Now I am not a port drinker, but I have guests ( Mum, Philip and Sarah) coming for Christmas lunch and will off course have a cheese board (any excuse) but I have to say I tried it and I may not share it. I only got a teeny tiny bottle and as It was the last one with slightly dodgy lid , got it for £6.00 instead of £8.00.

We had a good natter, tasting and laughing all day - great times and then when we got back to Plymouth we went to Endsleigh Garden centre and had the most yummy Gingerbread Latte's. Oh and discovered they sold Lyme Bay produce more expensive but nice to know - just in case I need a treat throughout the year.

That's it for today, Waiting to see what Mr W wants to do today - I have work today 3pm-5pm (covering staff shortage). Happy and content day though xx

Saturday, 22 November 2014

OOH Now that took me by surprise.

Posted by tracy watkiss at 10:35 0 comments
I actually managed to do some papercraft.

Struggling at the moment with emotions and such. 

But just went into my craft room sat down and made this.

Just a quick post as working in a mo xxx

Sunday, 2 November 2014

Sunday 2nd November

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:14 1 comments
Well what a week, no time to post as been work work work.

Thankfully the bosses arrived home on Friday and I am back to normal hours soon.
Talking of the bosses, whilst they were away, it was there 5th wedding anniversary and male boss asked me to make a themed card to give, before they went.

I agreed before I had thought it through, as I get anxious even just sitting at my papercraft desk, but I gave it a go. Whilst its not overly impressive to me, he liked it. So heres a peek. sorry about the bad photo.

The cardigan I am knitting is still going, but nearly finished the second sleeve and then just the shawl collar to do.

The Lace Shawl is finished, needs blocking now so hopefully get onto that today, will try to take pics of that one to show, I am hoping it comes out bigger than it is at the moment. I know it was just a cover the shoulder one, but it does look smaller than I anticipated.

I Went to the doctors and I have been put back on my happy pills, and also some pills to settle my stomach as I am under attack from acid - so preventative to stop an ulcer. Also been given exercises to do to help with the vertigo.  LOL!! I have had a good week.

So today sees me food shopping, greeting relatives from portsnouth and settling them in mums house, all ready for aunt Vals send off tomorrow - so another final goodbye, but lots of memories will be shared.

Friday, 24 October 2014

Friday 24th October

Posted by tracy watkiss at 08:51 0 comments
Yesterday was a lovely day just spent doing housework and knitting, I did not end up going into town for the yarn, will save that for Sunday or Monday.

I am on a mission to get the Cardigan I am knitting done, whilst I know the recipient will love it, I am not enjoying knitting it, as its grey, fishermans rib and I cannot show pics on here as it is a Christmas Gift.

I knitted a whole side front yesterday, but was naughty and started my very first Lace knit shawl (slippery little sucker of a yarn, so may be a challenge).

Today sees a 6 hour shift to be done - so no knitting till tonight.
We have fish pie for tea as I made it up yesterday, all we have to do is knit heat it up, doh! Knitting on the brain.  Knitting up a fish pie! Guffaw! Hilarious!!

Not on track food wise and not exercising, saw a comment on Facebook this morning in our running club page, that really may have put the nail in the coffin for me returning to club. Will have to find out the full details before I decide, as one side of the story and all that.

I know my stress levels are up, as the dizzy spells are back - one day at a time mantra is in force though.

Happy Friday everyone xxxxx

Thursday, 23 October 2014

Thursday 23rd October

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:29 0 comments
Such a busy week, bosses are away and overtime needs to be done, in all honesty though it is killing me. I find it tough enough to get out to do my own shifts, let alone do more.

Then there is the fact that we are not as sure on the Post Office counter side of things as the boss is, and the 2 people supposedly left in charge are having a bit of a power frenzy moment - even though they are both nice girls, its not making a very good work environment at the moment.

But IT IS A DAY OFF today!!!! Whoop Whoop. I get to do just what I want.

Yesterday morning before work, I had to pop to mums to get rid of some bits in the fridge she left before going on holiday.  Caught up on FB with Elaine and Novas antics on there 5 day break. Then I popped into Fabric and Paper to see Karen & Jill, so glad the Christmas fete was a good one for them, and to hear John is recovering well. Also found out Jill is very much the mad cat lady now.

Then into town, paid a bill and deposited money into bank, then drool time as I went into Dingles and looked at all the yummy rowan yarn.  I have 3 projects to knit as Christmas Gifts before I start on Some knitting for me.

I want to knit this

MMMMMMM!! Thinking light caramel for the blue, with a darker brown accent, with shades of mustard yellow, moss green, cranberry and cream to make it more autumnal. I will use Rowan pure wool 4ply.  OOOH I want to start it NOW!

All the while my beef stew was cooking in the slow cooker.

Well that was yesterday, Today I may just go back and get the Rowan wool, as I plan a day of knitting and home relaxation.

I am not a hustle and bustle person in the cooler months, honestly not a hustle and bustle person any month really. I am content in my own company. I would love a cottage in a village out towards the moor, to hide away in with a coal fire. I would spend the days, pottering, baking, knitting and reading. Walking my dog for a couple of hours a day. A blissful life. Please Euromillions be nice LOL!!!!

Must go, there is gift knitting to be done so I can get it finished xx

Wednesday, 15 October 2014

Wednesday 15th October

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:56 0 comments
Good morning

Ain't it grand to wake up to wet miserable weather. Everything looks so grey and dull.

I am a little tired today, bosses have gone on their holidays and it is leaving staff to cover lots of shifts, I started at 5.45 am yesterday and finished at 3pm. With 9 deliveries (including the main one for the week) in that time with different suppliers, to check in pay, book into computer system and put away. Cook the pasties, pies, sausage rolls for the day, open the shop, open the lottery terminal and post office counter, all the while serving customers the day literally flew by.

Came home had a bit of tea then out to get a free haircut from my friend Pauline, we sat and chatted for over an hour and it was lovely. She is one of my oldest non crafting / non exercising friends and I realised I have neglected our friendship in pursuit of other activities.  Maybe neglected is too strong a word, but I have come to realise that It was nice just to chat and sit with her, no rushing around so have agreed to meet up with her again soon. Hopefully in 2 weeks on a friday night either in either home or a pub.

I am also hoping to go catch up with Karen(owner of fabric & paper) at some point this week - wishing John a speedy recovery, and also Elaine and Nova this Friday. Then I hope to rejoin Kathy out running soon.

I tend to hide away from friends and family when I am not good, Its nothing personal to them, it is my coping mechanism. I don't mean to hurt peoples feelings by not seeing them as often as I should but these few people have all come into my life and have created good times for me and hopefully them. I feel we may not see one another as often as we should - everyone leads such busy lives nowadays, its such a shame we all have to work so hard, but I know if any of these people needed me I would be there for them and vice versa.

I love all my friends muchly xxx

Saturday, 11 October 2014

Sorry the mist descended!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 08:45 0 comments
Thursday was a goodish day but not food wise, now that should have set alarm bells off, yesterday was a total disaster on both mood and food. Yep I had a D day (demon day) one of those days that the depression and anxiety wins.

I did fight like hell through my shift at work all 6 very busy hours, with no break or even time for a cuppa.

Have another 6 hour shift today, but looking at the weather that's a good thing.

Hey ho - Blip days are what makes me at the moment.

On a positive note because I have learnt to except that these days are here for a bit, they are part of me (for now), I am planning a totally relaxed evening tonight - even going to have chippy tea, I know, how naughty. Then tomorrow I plan to get up, do the food shop and knit all day, may take Oscar on a long long walk if it is dry.

That's me for now.

Wednesday, 8 October 2014

Good Morning Peeps!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:38 0 comments
Well it looks like its trying to be a lovely Autumn day out there anyway. I love Autumn cold sunshine days, the turning of colour on leaves, the nip in the air just to remind you its nearly time to hibernate, indoors for winter, with movies and blankets, to be all toasty cosy and warm. Without having to go out, show off skin the colour of alabaster LOL! Not having to defuzz from the knee up, (well that's where my running leggings reach.) KIDDING!!!!! or am I??

 I am sat around trying to get through to my doctors surgery to find out if they have my results yet, I am itching to swim and run (see defuzzing IS still needed). So to relieve me from the never ending busy ringtone of the Surgery I have been looking through my Camera SD card. I really have not used the Camera as much as I wanted too - this is going to be rectified ASAP.

I did find a couple of photos on there from my holiday in Zante this year.

This was taken very early in the morning as we were heading out on the ferry to Olympia.

Aaah its lovely to have the experiences and memories of foriegn places.  On the same camera I also had pictures of a beautiful day spent with Elaine, Nova,  and Gary at Portland and Weymouth.

O well, this is getting nothing done, got through to surgery to be told results are not back yet. So continue the waiting game. Not got work till 5 tonight, so cuppa time and then to decide how we are going to spend today.

bye for now xx

Tuesday, 7 October 2014

Yummy food for chilly weather.

Posted by tracy watkiss at 11:54 0 comments
OOH it has turned cold really quickly, has it not?

Going to work this morning at 5,50am was a very BRRRRR!! moment.

Last night when I finished at 9.15pm I was so grateful I had prepared my evening meal earlier on in the day, and it was warming in the oven thanks to lovely hubby for popping it in before coming to pick me up.  It was one of those meals just right for a cold evening.

(forgot to take a pic, so borrowed one of off the Interweb, oops!)

Cowboy Pie

2 Weight Watchers Sausages (3pp)
1/2 can baked beans (4pp)
mushroom chopped
onion chopped
potatoes and a drop of skimmed milk. (4pp for potato, milk from daily milk points)

Brown Sausages and chop up. Put to one side.
Dry fry onion and mushroom mix in sausages and beans. pop into oven proof dish.
Boil and mash potato with a little milk and put on top of sausage and bean mixture. Bake in oven for 25 minutes on Reg 6 gas and enjoy.

If you are not watching your weight or have enough Pro Points add some grated cheese to the top MMMM!!!!!.

The Late Monday early Tuesday shifts are a killer and I intend to do not a lot for the rest of the day. A little bit of knitting and a cheesy afternoon film maybe.

Keep warm everyone xx

Monday, 6 October 2014

Thank god its monday!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:14 0 comments
Well what a weekend that was. One I hope is never ever repeated!

After my last post of losing Uncle Merv, Within 12 hours we Aunty Val had passed away. My poor Sarah (25) was in the room visiting as it happened too. Despite all the sadness, I am surprised though how the one thing that normally causes so much stress in peoples lives - Facebook, has actually managed to bring all the cousins together in their grief.

As a family we are spread far and wide, some even in Australia, this weekend was spent Saturday supporting one another through, but Sunday was more of a chatty day reconnecting with one another.

With all the sadness around I settled for a nice quiet day yesterday, went shopping with hubster for food for the week ahead.

Got my mum some sunflowers, to brighten up her sad weekend, and to remember happy times.

Then we came home and sat and watched the films "The Alamo" and Johnny Depp in "Charlie and the chocolate factory" all the whilst I knitted.

Now diet wise I think I did very well, Did not over eat Saturday and Sunday, was very mindful of my usual - sod it reaction to bad things, and I stayed within points. Sunday is always a heavier day food wise for me as it is the only day I am home all day so it's a tad harder but I normally save weekly points for this. But came out + 2pp, which is very good all things considered.

Today is my first new weigh day 10st 4 1/2lbs, I have a few weeks then I hope to rejoin my WW group. I need that structure and with my new working hours (after covering bosses holiday the next 4 weeks) I can attend a midday class.

Here is hoping we all have a good week, both with loved ones, diet and fitness wise.

Hugs xx

P.S  New Mental Attitude = New look Blog = Cheery Place xx

Saturday, 4 October 2014


Posted by tracy watkiss at 11:18 0 comments

Another loved one lost - R.I.P Uncle Merv

I awoke this morning to the sad news that my uncle passed away late last night.
My love goes out to my cousins
Sam, Raymond and Shaun.

After speaking to my Mum this morning and hearing the unexpected news, my resolve broke again if last nights total disaster of eating after hearing aunt Val is seriously Poorly and may not make the weekend was not enough, devouring chocolate, chips and bread and butter, (comfort food again) I went straight to the (comfort food) toast for Breakfast.

I was then already planning how I could stuff myself for the rest of the day to cope with the feelings and numbness of loss and grief.

Then I stopped. Thought, Got angry and screamed, NO!! Enough! Point that toast and plan your evening meal, the guilt of stuffing will not make things better, it will only make it worse.

Off to work in a bit - I don't want to go in today, but I must. Keep pushing through the fog!

If you are spending your day with family and friends today - remember to let them know just how much they mean to you and how much you love them xx

Friday, 3 October 2014

GOOOD MORNING!!! How you all feeling today!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 08:52 0 comments

I am up, having a leisurely banana breakfast (0pp) before I go to work at 11am there till around 5pm tonight. I like Fridays I work in my bosses other shop today (no post office counter in this one, so it is easier) but it is delivery day so super busy, and goes quick!

With the day time hours and no staff room, lunch is an on the shop floor/ store room type of affair. So in amongst the pastries savoury/ sweet, and the shop packaged sandwiches finding something healthy is a hazzle, but I WILL stay strong, little pack lunch for me today it is.

Marmite, cheese triangle on a Warburtons slim,(4pp) (don't knock it till you've tried it), followed by some carrot and cucumber sticks to dip in a honey and mustard dressing (0pp) and an apple (0pp).

Saving up the points as may be going out tonight with the hubster - a very rare event of an evening. I am trying to get him to go along to his old darts team night, just for male company and to have something to look forward too each week. It is something we are going to do together and then we are really going to concentrate on getting his half plot allotment going, as we have had it 8 months and done nothing. Which is entirely my fault as I hate digging and there is a lot to dig.

Still not happy about not being able to exercise at the moment, I hope the results don't take longer than the predicted 2 weeks - I want to do the Plymouth 10km I am booked and payed onto. I want to train and swim. I WANT TOO!!! LOL! Stamping feet is now an option.

Points left for evening 22pp/26pp
Activity points earnt so far this week 5aps (Thanks to walking).
Weeklies left 0pp/49pp (I want to keep my weigh day as a Monday/Tuesday, so eliminated weeklies to allow for no self control the beginning part of the week).

Thursday, 2 October 2014

It ain't nothing bad!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 16:57 0 comments
That's it today - the little voice in my head is telling me it ain't nothing bad.

I have been knocked down again, but life is constantly knocking people down, its how we cope that defines us, but take away those coping mechanisms. All that is left to do is get up, go to work and sleep.

So this is me for the next two weeks, waiting for results from the doctors, not being allowed to exercise at all - swimming NO! Running No! Arrrgh. I was loving running again, it was making me feel "normal" again, whatever that is.

I have spent a couple of days wallowing in self pity, then I realised that the old demons were sneaking in. NOOOO! we can't let that happen. I have to learn that if I am busy and the D's start I may have to have a nanna nap in the afternoon.  I am finding this is also necessary too, if I am working an evening shift - its a coping mechanism, but it stops me going sick or crying all the time. So I will have them if they are needed.

Today sees drawing yet another line to start eating healthy again - I am a comfort eater, and I have needed a lot of comfort lately.

So far today I have been good and tracked every morsel that I eat.

Saturday, 27 September 2014

Jo's gone home!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 10:01 0 comments
Well My daughter came and went in a whirlwind of a visit.

Monday Night we picked Lee & herself up from the train station and delivered them back to our youngest daughters house as their base. They were late arriving and very tired as Jo had finished a night shift that morning. Then I went to work.


Up for work at 5.45am and then finished at 11am, Picked up the family and went to visit the lovely Jo Phillips a school friend of my Jo, whom had just given birth to Twins Leo and Layla (well 3 weeks ago). We ooed and ahhed for over 4 hours, They really are the most scrummiest babes.

Then we all went out for a carvery and then home to rest.


Not much happened on Wednesday as far as I recall! other than work at 5pm till 9.15, ooh no I lie. Dale and I took a trip out to Tavistock, nope that may have been Monday morning. what did I do today - I HAVE NO BLOOMIN IDEA!!


A busy one, Up for a swim with Mum, then back to get family and off to Paignton for the mid day, slots and cranes along the pier as always, small fish and chip lunch a wander along, then home for a quick rest, took Jo and Lee back to the train station and Dale and I needed to kill an hour before I was due at Elaines house for a Juicing session. So we were very naughty and went to Burger King for tea, I much prefer this fast food joint to any other. It was lovely to eat a Whopper Meal. Then onto Elaines.

It was so informative and lovely. Elaine was the hostest, guest were myself, Nova and Debbie and Sharon was the juicing master (an old school friend of mine). Sharon is very tiny and just glows with health and happiness and she puts it all down to juicing and Jason Vale/Joe Cross.

Well I know I have lost weight with WW and exercise, I still have many health issues, Tiredness, really bad stress and anxiety levels, even rare indegestion attacks that see me throwing up and passing out (feels similar to heart attacks).

So I thought lets go and see what this is all about - It made a lot of sense, now you can detox on it, you can use it as a meal replacement, or you can add it to your healthy eating regime for a nutritious boost.

I was going to do the 7 day detox starting Friday.


Up and went and swam a Mile.

Green tea.
First Juice - Yummy

Went shopping to get all ingredients and algae and wheatgrass powder.

Another juice for lunch, Mid afternoon and 5pm whilst working 5-9.15pm, came home stressed out and not hungry at all, but needing to chew, had a chest pain also so decided to eat a lite sandwich and a banana and a packet of crisp.

Did not feel guilty, as I had in my eyes been sensible.


I am up not hungry - 2lbs lighter today.
Had my first juice - Lemon Ginger Zinger - it is lush!!
I am working 12 - 6 so will have a juice before I go for my lunch and maybe another whilst I am working.
Then home for shopping, Fajitas and Strictly.

With my work schedules I have decided as finishing late at night - I suffer to eat a main meal on arriving home to stick with a juice for brekkie, healthy meals when I am home to eat them and juices for evening meals or lunches when I am working at those times x

To see if I get any benefits at all. Nothing Ventured - Nothing gained

Monday, 22 September 2014

So far so good.

Posted by tracy watkiss at 16:40 0 comments
Today as I get ready for my shift at 5pm till 9.15pm I am on track for a very good day.

I have 15 pro points left for when I come home for my evening meal.
I have swam a mile (breast stroke - slow)
I have ran 1.86 miles on my treadmill as a tempo run - then realised it should have been temp intervals LOL!!! well same difference.

I have picked up my eldest daughter and son in law from the train station as they are down for 3 days visiting - Lovely Jubbly. Happy Happy Mummy!

Time to get back to me!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 07:31 0 comments
I have had the strangest couple of weeks,

I went away on holiday with my youngest daughter and when I came home it was like returning to some kind of twilight zone.
 Things were the same, but were they??
 Everything seemed just a little bit different.

Could not quite put my finger on it, but things were definitely different. I went from being very euphoric at being home from a lovely holiday to being really down and sad at things that appeared to have changed. So I ate!

Then I kicked myself about a bit and realised a wedding I was invited too was fast approaching so no point dieting until after that so I ate some more.

I have come to realise, when things start to go wrong in whatever field in my life - I blame me!!

If work is not good - I am bad at my job so must leave.
If family and friends disagree/ argue / or stay away - I must have done something wrong and agree with everyone to keep the peace, and do what they want to do rather than what I want. This really seems to piss my husband off.

So from today it stops. I have made a little rule - It is okay to be selfish and do what I need to do. I will still see family and friends and they will still see me if they want to, but on 50/50 terms.

Add this too the fact that I am now back tracking Pro Points and exercising things should see me being strong again.

Another thing is that I have decided to give up booze, may not be for ever but no more am I going to drink for drinking sake because everyone else is - I really don't like it! It makes me feel yuck and that I have consumed something my body does not like. Not hungover at all, but really bloated and uncomfortable. So I am attempting a tee total life. So that's where I am at. Back to losing a stone in weight, for Christmas. Off for a swim now with my MUM xx Laters x

Monday, 18 August 2014

Monday Morning - Fresh week - Fresh Start.

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:31 0 comments
Okay I have had a stinking cold all weekend - I had a really bad indegestion attack last night (these see me almost pass out and throw up) my bodies way of telling me to stop eating crap. But that was the weekend.

This Morning is bright new day, the rain has been and washed away all the cob webs.

This afternoon I start my new job, my nice relaxing just get on with it new job. Shift of 5pm - 9.15pm but going in at 3 for training up.

Today I want to get back on my healthy eating and exercise plan, to be as good as possible for the week towards holidays.

Short and sweet today x

Friday, 15 August 2014

Life's funny like that

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:57 3 comments

Okay, so here's where we are at!
I half owned a shop, got poorly. Walked away from shop with business partners help. 
Reflected and decided I wanted to be a nurse/ a carer someone who made a difference and looked after people. So I looked into College / Uni and got a job as a care assistant! 

I started Eating Healthy, Exercising and Running, I was BETTER!!!!!

SCREEECCHHH!!!! Hit the brakes! BANG!!!!

Oh how foolish, its all gone Pete Tong! (WRONG).

College was going to be full time - work would not be possible around it, (Financially not viable), 
So Okay, plan B work hard at the home obtain NVQ's everything will be fine

 Go to work happy happy, oh dear have a shift from hell  3 other staff members were not acting appropriate in front of residents, 
(younger staff letting laughter and language get out of control, making me take sharp intake of  breaths, then realising I was the only one in the dining room with 20 out of 22 residents, they slightly forgot they were there to work, residents noticed and started to comment and complain.) 
Don't get me wrong this home offers first class care, but this shift was totally out of the norm and needed nipping in the bud. So Next morning I reported my concerns to deputy, BIG MISTAKE one of them, a new member of staff took umbrage and has made it a mission to have a go at me at every opportunity( This young girl is very confident granted - but when does confidence turn to arrogance). Despite other staff and management agreeing with me and my position on the shift,   this sees my confidence and fragile shell shattered, discussions with family and friends ensued and  so healthy eating, exercise and running started to slip. So I decided to leave, the home did try to get me to change my mind, praising my care qualities, which was lovely.

Roll forward to today, and as I sit and type this it is the morning after my last ever shift. I am taking time out again. Time to just enjoy life, work a little, play a lot. I am lucky and have very supportive friends and family, one of which has given me a little part time job working 4 hour shifts, so I don't sit and fret LOL! The good thing is she knows my life style and I can now run again every Thursday night yay! 

I am away on Holiday with my Youngest daughter soon so on reflection I am going to eat with weight watching in mind but not totally on track until after the holiday. Enjoy running as often as I can until after too.

Then when I am home It will be operation Be Fitter ME!!

Oh and the caring, making a difference and looking after people mantra - don't worry its still within me - but I have finally realised it has to be to myself first.

Feeling optimistic, Okay I have lost round two of the battle, but I have not lost this war.

Sunday, 27 July 2014

Sunday Morning,

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:00 0 comments
Well I am sat in my PJ's thinking about getting dressed. 

Today I don't have work till 4.30pm - 8.30pm short shift that frustrates the hell out of me LOL! Wait all day to go in and then run around like a loon for 4 hours then home again. Its the waiting game that gets to me. I am finding I am very fidgety and need to be moving.

So what's the plan today.

Well I hope to be a good weight watcher today, although hubby still loves his roasts on a Sunday so roast beef tonight. Fruit and salad are the order for the rest of the day.

This morning I have decided I may pop into the shop to get back some of my craft goods from when I moved house. It has to be done, but to be honest it fills me with dread, A) as I don't want to craft at all and the sight  of all my stuff depresses me and B) when I go near the shop I have a panic attack and have an overwhelming sense of failure. 
But it has to be done, and have little time to do it as I must return my keys to Karen.

Hopefully exercise will clear my mind xx

Thursday, 24 July 2014

Things are turning a corner!!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 13:33 3 comments
And I seem to have found my


Slowly but surely I am feeling happier about myself. 
I have learnt if I have  a goal to aim for it keeps me sane.

So have put in place plenty. 
College and new career being one of them plans.

I also have discovered I am not happy if I am eating junk all the time, 
so have started to eat healthily again, 
another thing I have learnt
 that if I exercise during the day 
I am more awake in the moring, 
happier and able to do more over the course of the day
 and sleep better at night. 

So WW, swimming, running and gym are planned in for most days.

I have made a decision to have a total break from all things crafty.
No Knitting, Sewing or Papercrafting. 
So No Stampin up! either.

With this in mind I am going to sell off some bits. 
Not all of my stuff will go as I may come back to it in a year or two.

But my (Hardly Used) Cricut Expression and stamps I know I won't want, will go.
Along with a cuttlebug as well.

I still have sadness going on (much love to all my cousins that are bracing for a sad day) but its not weighing me down like it used too every day, the depression is still there and I had a really bad spell on Saturday/ Sunday, its something I am learning to live with, there is no quick fix, but I won't let it pull me down every single day. I am stronger than you and you won't win!


Tracy xxx

Saturday, 19 July 2014

Today is going to be a very PINK day!!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 12:52 1 comments
Although I am working this afternoon it is only a little shift. 4.30pm-8.30pm.

Today is most definitely dedicated to all things pink!
This morning I was wondering around the local B&Q garden centre when I spied a Dahlia and My instant reaction was - " Aww thats my ANN!"

Ann was a friend who passed away recently and to be honest I am still in total shock she is no longer with us, and that I won't see her cheeky smile or hear her naughty laugh again. Ann was such a bright, vibrant happy LADY in the true sense of the word.

So the flower had to come home with me

 DAHLIA - Fascination
Now to be known as "My Ann"

Happy Sigh!

When I finish work tonight at 8.30pm

Most normal sane people would be heading home for a Saturday night relax.
but not me, oh no, this girly is changing into a pink tutu, pink wig and trainers.
Meeting up with some friends and walking 15 miles for St Luke's Midnight walk.

MAD!! Yep!
so from 10pm till I crawl over the finish line in the early hours of tomorrow morning think of me.
Will try to pop a picture on tomorrow of me in all my finery xx
bye zee bye xx

Monday, 14 July 2014

Hope to be back posting Soon

Posted by tracy watkiss at 20:45 0 comments
I hope to be back posting on bloggy soon, but I am going to have a bit of housekeeping to tidy it all up, I am getting rid of all the individual pages and write what ever takes my fancy, on that day, just on the one blog.


Tuesday, 24 June 2014

Posted by tracy watkiss at 07:37 1 comments
Its been 10 days since my last post, and I am pleased to report that the new job is going very well, I seem to be working almost full time at the moment, as Lots of staff are taking holidays and as I am relief, I am covering a lot of peoples shifts all over the place.

That is good for me as I am now working with so many different members of staff and getting used to all the different routines quite quickly. Yes I am still loving it. Although it has knocked my diet and exercise routine for a big burden as shift work and eating needs practice. (this week I vow to achieve both).

Outside of work life things still continue to want to try us. I have an uncle who is fighting the C word, sadly he took a big tumble at home and has broken his femur (operation to fix, hopefully today) so thoughts are with him and my cousin Sam.

Sad news haunts me as on Saturday I heard that one of the loveliest Ladies I have ever had the privilege of meeting, knowing and calling a personal friend - Anne Selleck (whom I now know was called Peggy Ann Selleck) Suffered a brain haemorrhage on Thursday and unfortunately passed away over the weekend.
Anne was a wonderful lady, with a permanent smile and a giggle. She adored Gardening, Cardmaking, Charlie Bears and her lovely cat Oscar as well as her husband and son.
Anne was a member of my original band of ladies who would craft in my shed before we opened the shop. She was the naughty one - who only really came to half craft, give up and then eat cake and gossip.

I will miss you My Lovely Anne. Your Kindness will never ever be forgotten you were and always will be a true LADY and always in my heart xx

Saturday, 14 June 2014

Happy but exhausted!!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:54 0 comments
Wow! I know its been a while since my last post, but things really started to happen quite quickly re my career break/ change.

My DBS/CRB check came back all clear last week, and then I was told I would be having my Induction week as a carer this week. So alongside Monday and Thursday in the shop. I have done 2 day shifts (7.30 am - 3pm), One back shift last night (3pm - 10pm) and another back shift this evening. So 6 days work for the first time since November. I must admit to a few wobbles of anxiety, but all in all a good week. I am enjoying the care work, although I am aware I am very much the newbie, and getting used to each shifts routine is a BIG learning curve. But I find my self smiling and laughing a lot with the resident.

I am also finding no trouble what so ever getting my daily steps in, just working yesterday and walking home earnt me 3 activity points. WHOOP! WHOOP!!

I have about 3 weeks "working" in the shop left to do. I have 2 more induction shifts at the home next week which are night shifts, the biggest test as the shifts are 10pm - 7.30 am.  So wish me luck!

I am hoping to relax tomorrow and maybe just maybe do a little quilting xx

Thursday, 29 May 2014

Limbo land can be boring!!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 08:57 0 comments
Well I am still waiting for the DBS (CRB) tracking to be completed and the certificate to be delivered so I can start my new career.

I had a good giggle in the shop yesterday with the very very naughty wednesday quilting class. No illness talk, just tv, life, food and very rude bits LOL! they lead me astray and I can be very loud in this class. Me loud I know how hard to believe is that.

Dale has hospital today, fingers crossed it is a good day.

Elaine my friend if you read this, keep strong, Karma will be with you soon.
Attempting a trip back to running club tonight, to increase my distance back past 3 miles. First run at club since this time last year me thinks x

Wednesday, 21 May 2014

Hanging up my professional heat gun.

Posted by tracy watkiss at 18:00 5 comments
Well this is a post a long time coming in lots of ways.

I have decided that it is time for me to hang up my professional heat gun. As many of you know there have been a lot of changes in my life over the last year.

Also a lot of changes in Just Tracys (that was). Now known as Fabric & Paper. 

I have enjoyed my time demonstrating, writing mag articles, teaching and part owning a craft shop, but I am done, doing it for a living.  The people I have met and the friends I have made will stay with me forever. Karen is now the Owner (and all the responsibilities, teaching and coffee making duties are now hers, mwah ha ha). I hope you will continue to support her and the shop. 

So why ? quite simple! (I need a change and to earn a living wage.)  I need to know that the shop or community it has become, will be there for the ladies who love to come in and, craft, gossip and eat cake. (really, the amount of times I heard "Tracy, would you like cake? go on one won't hurt you." mmm! 8 classes a week all having goodies - that will hurt me. Lol). The shop is not in a position to pay me a living wage every week. So made it easier for me to say if I find a job, the shop saves money and means my lovely ladies are safely ensconced in their hobby haven. 

The decision was made and now I had to figure out what I wanted to do.

Well I like helping people, I care about them, especially the elderly. When I was younger I always wanted to be a nurse. So I applied for a position in a care home,   I had an interview and was told I have the job.

So I am going back to old roots. I have a job starting soon as a carer in a residential home. (It will be shift work, so you may see me in the shop sometimes having coffee). I have not got a start date yet!!! but it is imminent. I am so excited about a new challenge. I am going to be learning and getting qualifications and who knows where this will lead.

So now the people who needed to know know, I am just putting it here for anybody who  still reads this. 

Looking forward not back x

Tuesday, 13 May 2014

For my MUM!

Posted by tracy watkiss at 19:21 0 comments
I said I would post this on here just in case any of my crafty friends would be interested in either having a stall or just popping along.

Yes Mum Will be selling her cakes X

Tuesday, 29 April 2014

Not on top of my game at the moment.

Posted by tracy watkiss at 09:04 0 comments
So not alot to say but the other day I was perusing blog world roll and saw this topic on Carrots 'n' Cake.  I thought I'd give it a go.

1. What are you wearing? 

A very bright onsie, my daughter got me for Christmas xx 

2. Ever been in love? 

Yep, still am. It's been nearly 18 years and I can't imagine a day without him. 

3. Ever had a terrible breakup?

Yes or so I thought, my first boyfriend (I wanted to explore life more, even though I loved him, I was 14 LOL!) 4. How tall are you?


5. How much do you weigh?

10st 2lbs on my scales this morning Need to lose 9lbs to get back to goal (ww scales vary)

6. Any tattoos?


7. Any piercings? 

I only have 2 holes in each earlobe. Although I only wear earrings in 1 hole in each.

8. Favorite song?

This changes with my mood, so cannot really answer it.

9. Quality you look for in a partner? 

Honesty and giggles

10. Favorite quote?

11. Favorite actor?

Old: Danny Kaye (he makes me laugh) Today: Hugh Jackman (Hubba hubba)

12. Loud music or soft?

 working out? The louder the better. At Home? Soft

13. Where do you go when you're sad?

Home, to bed or out with my besties

14. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

 I can be out the door in 15 minutes when I am not fighting Depression, (if the evil twin is around as I look at It being a Gemini it can take me all day.)

15. Ever been in a physical fight?


16. Turn on?


17. Turn off?


18. Fears?

Honestly, you want me to list them, I will be here all day.

19. Last thing that made you cry? 

The nastiness of others.

20. Last time you said you loved someone? 

To the hubs, this morning

21. Meaning behind your Blog name? (This said YouTube but I don't have one of those.)

It's because I play... craft, run have fun and stuff. (normally)

22. The relationship between you and the person you last texted?

Hubs calls them my stalkers, I call them my Besties (Elaine and Nova) I have another Bestie who lives in Berkshire (Lynn) but I spoke to her on the phone at the weekend. 

23. Favorite Food?


24. Place you want to visit? 


25. Do you have a crush? 

Not at present

26. Last time you kissed someone?

This morning 

27. Last time you were insulted? 

Last week

28. Favorite piece of jewelry?

My engagement ring 

29. Who should answer these questions next?

 If you're bored and uninspired like I was... go for it. 

Friday, 25 April 2014

Posted by tracy watkiss at 13:48 0 comments
Oh my what a lovely day it is today, the sun is shining and I have heard a summer song on the radio.

Katrina and the waves - Walking on Sunshine.

I was really struggling yesterday, but I did go along to My running club last night and signed up as a non competitive runner for this year.

It was great to see some friendly faces, 
(Although one person needs to learn respect for the coaches and leaders especially if they want to be on the committee and not mutter insulting words to another leader about someone else. Not Adult behaviour at all. I for one won't vote for that particular person, as respect for others is a must have for criteria for me.)

OOh sorry little rant there. 

Tonight I am looking forward to a lovely evening with friends, we are going out for a relaxing meal, to say goodbye to a very trying week. 

Hope you have a lovely day whatever you are doing xx

Wednesday, 23 April 2014

No Song today! :-(

Posted by tracy watkiss at 16:33 2 comments
Today was a slow start for me, I knew the minute I woke up it was going to be a struggle day.

I went to work though, tried to make the dress I started, but kept going from bad to worse mistakes wise.
So gave up.

Managed to sit with the quilters this afternoon. Jude, Kim and Marcelle had me chuckling so that will be my happy thought for today.

But I am absolutely drained.

Will try to walk Oscar later, but feel it might be an early night. Despite the sad eyes. (Dale may have to take him down the field).

Tuesday, 22 April 2014


Posted by tracy watkiss at 10:36 5 comments
Good morning

I am sat in the shop typing this morning.  I should have got up when I first awoke at 6.45am but I did not drifted back off and got up nearer 8am, this is the worst thing I can do as I know it makes me sleepy for the rest of the morning.

I know some friends of mine are having more stressful days than me today so today's song is an upbeat, sing it loud song. To keep them buoyant and above the political craziness in work situations.

Wilson Philips - One More Day

My Happy thought today was my dog walk with Oscar last night, 

It was warm enough not to wear a jacket and we poodled along the nature reserve down Tamerton way and back. The sun was still out, all was quiet and we could hear all the birds tweeting. (told them they should use FB) sorry could not help myself LOL!

I hope you all have happy days today.


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